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Thread: Office Humor.

  1. #1
    mixedgas's Avatar
    mixedgas is offline Creaky Old Award Winning Bastard Technologist
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    Default Office Humor.

    I had to order a part at work today.

    It resulted in this memo, and I quote myself:

    ;set humor mode = true/

    In the future, submission of "REQUISITIONS" on Fridays, shall be considered grounds for Hazardous Duty Pay.

    Submission of recs, where I have to defend the professional Honor of a student, (who submitted the previous Rec) shall result in the additional job title of "Brave Sir Dragonslayer, Knight Defender of the Faith"

    ;set humor mode = off/


    End Quote
    Steve

  2. #2
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    //You should make that recursive...
    Love, peace, and grease,

    allthat... aka: aaron@pangolin

  3. #3
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    You just can't beat a fun day at the workplace, eh Steve?

  4. #4
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    We tested a new PA speaker product today, in my evaluation report I had a little fun with my Executive Summary.

    Music reproduction was awful. I have not heard music reproduction so poor in a long time! The voicing was horribly over accentuated in the lower mid-range between approximately 200Hz and 800Hz. Low end response was poor. The High end response was poor to almost non-existent. Voice reproduction was terrible.

    Clearly the choice of driver was not ideal and the cabinet may have responded to additional damping material as was the case with the *****. although the addition of 10 x 40’ semi-trailers full of damping material would not have helped the sound reproduction by any humanly appreciable degree.

    MacDonalds drive-through sound systems sound like Turbosound rigs compared to this.

    This speaker has helped redefine crap sound reproduction and has taken our reference scale to previously unimaginable limits.

    If this speaker had to be summarised in two words, those words would be “Shit Sandwich” †


    ---------
    † 1984, Spinal Tap. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0088258/quotes
    This space for rent.

  5. #5
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    WOW are we a bunch of fun nerds, lol. I love humor 98% of the world well never even get or let alone read. :}
    Mario

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  6. #6
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    God we are aren't we.. and I read Dnar's sig "Black Holes are where God divided by zero." and understood it.. and laughed .. but I think you're right Ragdoll, most of the world wouldn't understand ... us .. but, on the other hand, judging from the number of members here .. and it's still increasing .. there's some peops there who do get it .. and .. I wouldn't mind seeing 1 or 2 ads up top if it would help Spec .. How many people visit here per day ...?? Staggering prolly ..

  7. #7
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    Smile

    Steve ... reminds me of something that happened a few weeks ago

    Im working out in India at the moment and have a team of guys installing production lines here ...
    One guy had just arived with us and had forgotten his safety shoes ....

    So he went down to the stores to aquire a pair.....

    now the conversation goes like this ( think along the lines of a monty python sketch )

    *************************************************

    Our guy: good morning i would like a pair of size 9 safety shoes

    Storeman: i will go and get them for you
    ( goes off comes back with shoes )

    Storeman: Do you have a requisition for these shoes

    Our guy: er No .....

    Storeman: Sorry sir .. i can not give you these shoes without a requisition.

    Our Guy: oh dear .... in that case can you tell me who can issue me with a requisition

    Storeman: that will be me sir

    Our guy: can you issue me with a requisition for the shoes please

    Storeman: Certainly sir

    ( the storeman tears off a requisition ... hands it through the store window )
    ( our guy looks at the requisition for 2 seconds then hands it back )
    ( the storeman takes it .... and hands our guy the shoes )

    Storeman: Have a nice day sir
    ( our guy walks away bemused )

    if only it was that simple all of the time


    all the best

    Karl

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    That's India!!! Steeped in bureaucracy and a mountain of forms.

    Last year I stayed at an historical "sports club" in Kolkata. There was a form for friggin everything. Took me an hour to check in and another to check out!!!! When I left, my car was stopped at the main gate (a long way from the club) as they had missed a form I had to sign!!!!
    This space for rent.

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