A Joke a day..

[ShortyInCanada]

So this thread has sunken down to the level of stupid "Knock-knock" jokes and the likes....well OK then. I've got TONS of those ...
From an actually published source 20 years ago :
What's red, round, and has shiny white teeth ?
An Apple. I lied about the teeth.
So why don't apples go to the dentist ?
I just told you, apples don't have teeth !
Do you know why apples don't have teeth ?
Because they don't have fingernails to bite either !

This was just on one page of the seventy plus of the book. None of them is much better.
So come up with better jokes or I shall subject you all to another batch of those !
(They are great when a bunch of drunks are all lazing around a campfire on a rainy camping trip and nobody is motivated to move away. The groans and stuff can be very amusing while the jokes certainly aren't !)

[Phredy1]

When you drink Vodka over ice, it can give you kidney failure,

When you drink Rum over ice, it can give you liver failure,

When you drink Whiskey over ice, it can give you heart problems,

When you drink Gin over ice, it can give you brain problems.

When you drink Scotch over ice, it can give you nervous system problems

Apparently, ice is really bad for you.


Warn all your friends!

[colouredmirrorball]

Wait, isn't ice the solid form of dihydrogen monoxide? That stuff that is very dangerous and should be banned? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MawlljmaS1w

[LaNeK779]

Ben Dover and Phil McCrackin.

hey wayne, maybe you could write down these two names on a piece of paper and give them to the announcements desk of the airport on your way back saying "could you page these two gentlemen please, i need to find them"

it would be a good laugh to hear these names all over the airport PA system

[dnar]

hey wayne, maybe you could write down these two names on a piece of paper and give them to the announcements desk of the airport on your way back saying "could you page these two gentlemen please, i need to find them"

it would be a good laugh to hear these names all over the airport PA system

Better still, have them page for Mike Hunt. What movie was that from? "Paging Mike Hunt, has anyone seen Mike Hunt?".

Cheap toilet humor. Cracks me up though.

[Phredy1]

it would be a good laugh to hear these names all over the airport PA system

Jack Mehoff

15 chars

[dnar]

Jack Mehoff

15 chars

Al Koholic - to quote Bart Simpson.

I kid you not, there used to be a doctors surgery nearby, the doctors names? Dr Blades and Dr Butcher.

[steve-o]

Books:

"Yellow River" by I.P. Freeley
"Under the Bleachers" by Seymour Butts
"In the Lions Den" by Claude Balls

[dnar]

I think they've been putting something in your tea Wayne

Pfffff. I am so old and ugly that when I go to clubs I have to spike my own drinks.

[Jem]

^^^^ Haha, nice one. Don't know why but I thought that was really funny